admittance.

the first step is admitting you have a problem, right?

i want to be in a relationship again. i hate being single. i'm happier when i'm with somebody. and i hate admitting that. god i hate it. i wish i could express the exasperation i'm feeling right now admitting this. i've paced, i've slumped over, i've held my head in my hands, all trying to figure out what to say next. trying to figure out what i want to say, what i'm ready to admit.

i mean, yeah, sure. i can be happy by myself. i've had plenty of fun and good times being single. my point is that i was happier when i was in a relationship. everything just seemed better.

and, yes, i do have a specific person in mind. but he's going to go unnamed. it's not like anything's going to happen there anyway.