rut.

Today at work, I came across an article called The Up Side to Being in a Rut

At the beginning of the article, the woman states quite plainly, "I'm over the summer." And you know what? So am I. At the end of every spring I get all excited about the upcoming summer months. I always forget, though, that by July 5th, I'm pretty much over the whole vacation. It's at this point that I miss my friends. I miss having an actual schedule. I'm tired of working all the time and I'm tired of my parents having control over me again. And by August, when it's the hottest, laziest, dog days of summer, I'm entirely, 100% over summer and over my vacation.

There's a reason why fall is my favorite season and at the end of spring, I always seem to forget that. With fall comes the clothes I look best in, my birthday, my favorite holiday (Halloween), and the feeling that I'm actually accomplishing things and worth something to someone.

But, back to the topic on hand. I'm in a rut. I've been in a rut. This rut sucks. The problem is, I have zero will power to get out of my rut. I tried a 10-day diet thing. I gave up on day 3 due to lack of will power. I tried out my "no hooking up with someone I'm not in a relationship with" rule again, but what do you know? A certain person calls up and there goes the will power to keep that rule in effect. I decide to get up the energy to clean/organize my room so that I'm ready to leave in a week. I get half way through cleaning off my dresser, then get distracted by reading a magazine I found. After the magazine's done, I decide I'll do the rest later. Well, it's later. Is the rest done? No.

The problem is, I can't just sit back and wait for the end of my rut like the woman in the article says to do. It makes me all anxious just sitting around, waiting for something huge to come along and change the way I go through my day to day routine. I can only assume moving back to Rock Hill will be the end of my rut. It's the only thing in the foreseeable future that will change the way I do things with my life.

Good God. These 8 days can not go by fast enough.